


More than Lovers

by cyberfroot



Category: Video Blogging RPF, jacksepticeye - Fandom, markiplier - Fandom, youtube - Fandom
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Friends to Lovers, Friendship/Love, Gen, Mark Fischbach - Freeform, Markiplier - Freeform, Neglect, Reader-Insert, Sean McLoughlin - Freeform, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Insert, jacksepticeye - Freeform, little angst, mark is readers childhood friend, reader - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-11
Updated: 2017-11-28
Packaged: 2018-09-16 21:57:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 6,054
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9291281
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cyberfroot/pseuds/cyberfroot
Summary: It's almost like he forgot you existed, no wonder you ran off into another man's arms.





	1. Leaving

         “Mark!” You called excitedly into your phone. “I miss you. When are you going to come back to Cincinnati?” You asked, leaning back against the pillow of your bed.

         “Uh the next time is for Christmas.” Mark answered. Christmas was more than half a year away! You frowned and fiddled with your shirt. “I have plenty of space in my apartment and you’re welcome to come visit anytime, I’d even help pay for the plane ticket if you couldn’t yourself…” Mark rambled.

         “You know I’d love too.” You said, looking towards the empty side of the bed. “But I don’t think…”

        “You don’t think Ben will let you.” Mark interrupted. “Y/n he’s not your parent he shouldn’t control you like this.” Mark knew your relationship wasn’t the best. You meet Ben in high school and instantly fell in love with him. Ben knew you’d follow his every word like a lost puppy so he’d take advantage of you. Mark was sick of it, every time you got your feelings hurt you’d run to him crying but you never took his advice.

         “Mark…” You said softly. “You know I can’t leave him. I…”

         “You love him?” Mark interrupted again. “I’ve heard this speech so many times, you know you don’t love him y/n,” Mark raised his voice in anger. “You’re just scared to leave him because you don’t think you can do better!”

         You knew Mark only wanted the best for you. And you knew the reason his words hurt was because they were true. But you were too stubborn to admit it. You tried to think of a comeback, but nothing came to mind. Instead, you sighed and hung up. You set your phone down on the nightstand and ignored the vibrations as Mark called you again. You rolled to the side, your cheek pressed against the pillow, and debated on whether to get up or not.

         Mark gave up calling you on the third try; you knew he didn’t mean to hurt you. Even you could tell he was tired of the problems your relationship caused.

         Now you were starting to doubt if Ben would even notice if you were gone, and you were afraid to tell Mark that. He hasn’t been home in four days. For four days you have been listening for the door to open at any moment to announce your boyfriend’s arrival. You didn’t want to report him missing to the police because he told you he was leaving. But he was so vague about it, it makes you worry that he left you for some other woman. You grabbed your phone and unlocked it, ignoring the text messages from Mark.

 _I’m going to be gone for a couple days don’t misbehave._  The last text Ben sent you. It felt cold and impersonal, almost like a professional email.

         In high school the only thing you and Ben had was love, what went so wrong? You rolled onto your back and started to count the cracks on the ceiling. It only took 10 to make your decision.

        You shuffled out of bed and grabbed your laptop, researching flights to LA. You needed to get out of this goddamn apartment if it was the last thing you do. You had saved quite a bit of money from your job before Ben made you quit, saying you were always gone when he needed you.

         You grabbed your phone and texted Mark,

          **You:**  Do you have a room available?

          **Markimoo:**  Of course, when are you coming?

          **You:**  I don’t know, how about in two days? And I don’t know how long I want to stay; I just need to get away for a while.

          **Markimoo:**  I’ll be ready for you! Tell me when your flight lands so I can pick you up from the airport.

          **You:**  Thanks Mark, This means a lot to me.

          **Markimoo:**  Anytime y/n.

         You smiled and locked your phone. You wondered if you should tell Ben, you’re sure he’d be worried if he came to an empty apartment. You sent him a quick text, telling him you’ll be in LA for a while. He didn’t respond. Your eyes flickered over the heart next to his contact name you frowned but didn’t delete it. You weren’t breaking up with him, not yet at least. 

         You found a morning flight in two days and booked your flight. You texted Mark the details. You felt excited for the first time in a long time and couldn't wait to leave. 

 


	2. Plane and Car

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "He pulled you into a warm embrace that felt like home more than Ben’s arms ever did"

         You awoke to your alarm in confusion, you never set alarms for yourself; suddenly, it dawned on you. You were finally visiting Mark! You rushed out of bed and into the bathroom. The shower was too cold when you stepped in, but you didn’t want to wait for the water to heat up.

         After getting dressed and drying your hair, you called an uber to pick you up. Next thing you know you were standing in line for security.

         You pulled out your phone to text Mark,

**You:** Hey mark, in line for security. Really excited to see you!!!

**Markimoo:** Have a nice flight; I’ll be there to pick you up. Just remember not to look for the red hair because I dyed it back :p

         You smiled, you loved mark’s red hair when he last visited you but his hair was so damaged from all the bleaching.

~

         Your flight was boarding soon and you couldn’t help the nervous smile that etched its way onto your face. You really wanted to see Mark but flying scared you a little. You’ve read the statistics that you’re more likely to die on your way to the airport than on the plane but that didn’t sooth your nerves. Perhaps it was because you didn’t ride an airplane until after you had read all the terrible stories about them and became forever nervous that you’d end up a nameless body from the thousand that died. You didn’t notice that your leg started bouncing rapidly. 

         “Flight 38 to Los Angeles is now boarding” the intercom announced. You tried not to jump up too quickly, you just wanted this damn flight over with already.

         You found your seat no problem, and no one was sitting next to you. At least, not yet. Not everyone had finished boarding but you were almost at the end of the line of passengers. All your hopes were crushed when a man with body odor noticeable from a mile away sat next to you. You held back the urge to vomit and smiled at him politely. He smiled back and sat down in the adjacent seat. You put your earbuds in your ears and turned to the window, this was going to be a long flight.

         You were glad Mark was willing to have you stay, but you felt in debt to him. Maybe paying him rent would be the solution? Or buying his meals? You didn’t know but you would figure it out once you saw him.  

~

         The plane finally landed and you couldn’t be happier. Not only did you make it to LA alive, but you didn’t throw up on the guy. You pulled out your phone to text Mark again.

**You:** I just landed, hope you’re there to pick me up lol

**Markimoo:** I just found a place to park I’ll be waiting for you near the entrance.

         You smiled and pushed your phone back into your pocket. You were fairly far back in the airplane so it took awhile before you could make your way out of the airplane.

         Luggage in hand, you made your way to where mark said he was. Despite his instructions, you still couldn’t find him.

**You:** Mark I can’t find you :(

**Markimoo:** I see you give me a sec.

         It only took a few seconds before you felt a tap on your shoulder. You spun around quickly and were greeted by Mark’s smiling face. He pulled you into a warm embrace that felt like home more than Ben’s arms ever did. You smiled into Mark’s chest and wrapped your arms around him. What felt like hours later you separated and Mark picked up the luggage you dropped.

         “Mark I can handle my luggage, you don’t need to do that.” You said, trying to take your luggage away.

         “I wouldn’t be a true gentleman if I didn’t!” Mark responded, his same silly tone that made you nostalgic. You shook your head lightly while following Mark to his car. He stops in front of a sleek black Mercedes.  Your shock must have shown on your face because Mark chuckled.

         “My apartment’s rent isn’t too expensive so I can afford this nice car.” He said, putting your luggage in the trunk. You open the door to the passenger side and slip in, Mark follows suit.

         “How was your flight?” He asked, putting his keys into the ignition, “I know you don’t like planes.”

         “You’re right I don’t,” You laughed, “But the flight was fine, if it weren’t for the guy sitting next to me. I could smell him for the whole flight and he really didn’t smell good.”

         “Ew. That sounds awful” Mark said, scrunching his nose up. “Are you hungry?”

         “Yeah I am actually.”

         “Great! Amy and I were hoping to take you out to lunch, she really wants to meet you.” Mark said turning to look at you.

         “Amy?” You questioned.

         “Oh! Didn’t I tell you? Amy’s my girlfriend.” Mark said, shifting nervously in his seat.

         “Markimoo finally got a girlfriend?” You teased. “I’m happy for you, I bet she’s great.” Mark smiled, visibly relieved but his face shifted to nervousness again.

         “I know you needed a break from your relationship and I didn’t know if mine would be a distraction to you…” Mark rambled.

         “Mark. Seriously. I’m happy for you. Don’t worry.” You said, resting your head against your hands as you gazed out the window, taking in the LA scenery.

         “Great. I’m glad,” Mark paused taking a breath, “I’m glad you’re taking a break from Ben, I’m worried about you y/n, you cut yourself off from everyone and-”

         “Mark.” You interrupted “Can we please not talk about this.”

         “Right.” Mark said, obviously frustrated. “We’re almost to the restaurant, Amy’s meeting us there.”

 

 

 


	3. Diner

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "it felt nice to know someone cared about you"

                The diner had amazing food. You had ordered a club sandwich, Mark and Amy both ordered cheeseburgers. Amy and Mark sat across from you, their knees always touching. You marveled at how casually they made physical contact; whenever Ben touched you he was always suggesting he wanted something.

                “y/n, you’re just as amazing as Mark talked you up to be!” Amy said, her blonde hair swaying as she talked animatedly.

                “Thanks.” You mutter, shoving another French Fry in your mouth. “Are you a YouTuber like Mark?” You ask, pushing your plate forward slightly. Mark and Amy both finished a lot earlier than you.  

                “No actually, I’m a graphic designer.” Amy said, “What do you do?” Her question was innocent but you weren’t sure how to answer that. ‘My asshole boyfriend made me quit’, or maybe just simply ‘I don’t work.’ But that leaves too much room for assumption and you didn’t want Amy to think you were mooching off of someone or just lazy. You worked hard for your degree and it’s not your fault he made you quit. Except, it was your fault, you could have broken up with him at any time, it’s your fault because you let him become so controlling.

                “I… uh, I have to go to the bathroom.” You said, stepping out of the booth.

                “Do you need directions?” Amy asked, obviously aware that you’re avoiding her question.

                “No.” You paused and decided the statement was too harsh, “I’ll find it, thanks though”

                “Yeah, no problem.” You could feel their eyes burn into your back as you stumbled towards the bathroom sign. Once in the bathroom, you exhaled the breath you didn’t know you were holding.

                “Fuck.” You muttered, turning on the sink and splashing your face. You turned to the mirror and analyzed your features. You noticed that your dark circles were growing, and you were breaking out. You frowned and popped the white heads.

                Amy was so pretty, she had clear skin and her hair wasn’t damaged even though you could tell she bleached it. You wondered if Ben would’ve liked her more than you. You were prettier in high school; you hadn’t realized how difficult it was to exist yet. You’re surprised Ben hasn’t left you yet, maybe he knew how reliant you were on him and that you’d be nothing without him.

                A knock on the door broke you out of your thoughts, you quickly washed your hands and left, passing the person silently.

                Amy and Mark stopped talking as soon as they realized you were near the booth. You sat down, avoiding eye contact.

                “I got a text when you were in the bathroom.” Mark said.

                “What does that have to do with me?” You responded, lifting your eyes to his.

                Mark chuckled, “My friend Sean is going to come visit next week, I figured that you would still be here so I wanted to make sure that’d be okay with you.”

                “It’s fine.” You said, it really wasn’t fine but you didn’t want to ruin Mark’s friendship. You’d rather not become invisible to Mark when his friend visits, he was already taking a lot of time out of his day to hang out with you anyways.

                “I’m sure you’ll love him!” Mark says, “The only problem is he’s very loud.”

                “Great.” You muttered. You really didn’t like it when people raised their voices, it made the back of your throat tight and your heart beat always increases. You noticed that the dirty plates were missing from the table. “Did the waiter come by with the check?” You asked.

                “Yeah.” Mark responded. “We’re waiting for my credit card.” You frowned.

                “I was going to pay,” You admitted, “I feel bad.”

                “For what?” Amy chimed in.

                “For abusing your hospitality.”

                Mark frowned. “Don’t think of it that way!” He said, his hands curling into fists. “I am so happy to have you here y/n, and you need to stop thinking that you’re some kind of burden because you’re not! You’re a wonderful friend and I’m so glad to know you.”

                It was too late to stop the tears streaming down your face. You murmured many apologies as Mark and Amy stood up to hug you. You’re sure that the people in the diner heard the whole exchange but you didn’t care, it felt nice to know someone cared about you.

                “I’m sorry for embarrassing you.” You sniffed.

                “You didn’t embarrass us.” Amy said.


	4. Car

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "All you needed was a good friend"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> n/n means nickname. And I promise that Jack will be in the next chapter. I just didn't want Jack to really help the reader I think that was Mark's job lol

                You sat in the passenger seat of Mark’s car; your head was resting on the window.

                “Is Sean a YouTube friend?” You asked. The car was silent, Mark didn’t really like music and he especially didn’t like commercials.

                “Yeah, he’s one of my closest YouTube friends actually.”  Mark said, he opened his mouth to continue but his phone interrupted him. “Can you answer that for me?”

                “Yeah.” You mumble, grabbing his phone from the cup holder he put it in.

                “Hello?” You ask.

                “Mark!” The staticy voice said. You realized that you forgot to check the name before answering. “Wait you’re definitely not Mark, where is he?”

                “Um, He’s driving currently. I could put you on speakerphone?” You said, you felt butterflies growing in your stomach. Phone calls weren’t easy for you.

                “Yes!” The voice responded. You pulled the phone away from your ear and pressed the speaker button.

                “Hello?” Mark asked loudly. You tensed a little, but came to your senses quickly. Mark never meant any harm to you.

                “Mark!” The voice said, equally as loud.

                “Jackaboy!” Mark exclaimed. The name didn’t seem familiar, you wondered if he was a YouTube friend.

                “So I just wanted to make sure you know that I’m visiting you next week, you never responded to my text.” Jack (you presume) said. You furrowed your brows.

                “But I thought your friend Sean was visiting next week?” You asked Mark. He and Jack laughed.

                “Jack and Sean are the same person y/n.” Mark said, “Jack is just a nickname.”

                “Oh.” You said, turning your attention back to the window. Los Angeles wasn’t as pretty as you thought it would be. So far all you’ve seen were buildings and traffic. You zoned out the rest of the conversation between Mark and Sean, or Jack. You didn’t know what name he preferred.

                Your phone interrupted your thoughts. It was a text. From Ben.

**Ben <3: **I come home to an empty bed, how ungrateful are you? Come home right now.

                You frowned, he was obviously not happy. But you had texted him telling him you’d be gone. You could tell Mark noticed your discomfort, but he continued his conversation with Jack/Sean.

                “Well, I gotta go.” Jack/Sean said. “I’ll see you soon Mark. And I’m excited to meet you y/n.”

                “Bye Jack.” Mark responded. You mumbled goodbye as well, and hung up the phone.

                “Alright. What’s on your phone that’s making you sad?” Mark asked.

                “It’s Ben.” You whimpered. “He wants me to come home.” Your lower lip quivered and you could feel the tears pool up in your eyes. “I- I don’t know.”

                “I understand n/n.”  Mark said. “I was in an abusive relationship too. I know how hard it is to leave. But I also know how much better your life is once you finally do leave.”

                “Mark-”

                “Don’t say anything.” He interrupted. “I have an outside perspective. You might not think it’s abusive but I _know._ I want what’s best for you.”

                You stayed quiet after that. It took a while for you to realize, but the signs are all too clear. A year or two ago and you would have argued with Mark for hours. Sometimes that was what your phone calls became.

                You used your sleeve to wipe the few tears that escaped.

                “I’m so sorry Mark. I’m so sorry that I dragged you into this-”

                “Y/n. You didn’t drag me into anything. Your relationship is a part of your life and I’m happy to be a part of your life.”

                The car ride was silent the rest of the way to his apartment. And you were more than grateful for that silence; it gave you plenty of time to think about how you’ll break up with him.

~

                “Chica is going to be happy to meet you.” Mark said, grabbing your luggage out of the trunk and walking over to where you stood.

                “Chica?” You asked. You felt so out of the loop of Mark’s life. You recognize that it’s most likely because most of your conversations revolved around your stupid problems, but you couldn’t help but feel like you’d been neglecting Mark as a friend.

                “My dog! She’s a golden retriever and a sweet heart. You’ll love her.”

                You smiled. You loved dogs and had always wanted to adopt one once you moved out, but Ben said they smelled bad and are too much work.

                Mark playfully frowned, “You’re not gonna ignore me for the dog are you?”

                “You know me Mark, dogs before dudes.”

                He groaned loudly, eliciting a chuckle from you. His fake annoyance turned into a beaming smile when he realized he made you laugh.

                “I haven’t heard you genuinely laugh in a long time y/n.”

                You stared at Mark in shock. You suddenly remember how emotionless you’d been when you lived with Ben. He carved you into a hollow shell of the person you once were. No wonder your parents cut you out of their lives. No wonder you lost friendships.

                Mark made you feel whole again; you guess that all you needed was a good friend.


	5. Sean

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Damn was he attractive"

~

                Sean was coming today. But that wasn’t the only thing making you nervous; Mark was making you break up with Ben today as well. You had both agreed that you were definitely going to break up with him, though you had continued to stall.

                “Alright y/n, I’m gonna go pick up Sean from the airport. If you hadn’t broken it off with Ben by the time I get back I’m gonna do it for you” Mark announced. He closed the front door after him, leaving you alone. Chica was resting her head on your lap and you absentmindedly pet her. Maybe you should change into something other than the pajamas you had been wearing for two days straight.

                You headed into the guest bedroom, your clothes were strewn everywhere. You felt a little bad, after all this wasn’t your house to make messy. It only took you twenty minutes to completely clean the room and organize your suitcase. You had even decided on a cute outfit that was sure to make a good impression on Sean.

                You went back to the living room; Chica was laying on the couch, leaving little room for you. You picked up her head and placed it back on your lap. Your gaze rested on your phone, haphazardly lying on the coffee table.  You didn’t know what to tell him.

~

                You woke up curled on the couch with Chica. You must have fallen asleep after staring at your phone. You didn’t feel any more confident breaking up with him now than you did before falling asleep. You guessed calling him would be the best option, but you didn’t want to sound unsure.

                “Fuck it.” You mumbled. You grabbed your phone and called him without second thought. He answered after 5 rings.

                “What?” He asked. His voice was cold; it was the only tone he used around you anymore. You took a deep breath.

                “I’m breaking up with you.”  Your voice sounded weaker than you intended it to, but hearing those words leave your mouth caused waves of relief to wash over you.

                “What?” He asked again, he sounded shocked. “You can’t do that y/n. You’re nothing without me.”

                “That’s not true.” I said. “Mark’s helped me see that I don’t need you. You’re dead to me Ben.”

                “Mark?!” Ben yelled. “So that’s it huh. You’ve been cheating on me with that faggot Mark.”

                “Don’t you _dare_ call him that Ben.” You yelled. The calm you felt was replaced with anger. “He’ll mean more to me than you ever will! You ruined my life!”

                “ _I_ ruined your life?” He inquired. “How did _I_ ruin your life?”

                “You cut off my friendships! You stole my paychecks! You made my quit my job!” You yelled.

                “Oh y/n. I didn’t do any of those things. It was all on you.” He said. You could feel his smirk through the phone. “You could’ve broken up with me anytime; all of this was your fault.”

                You felt defeated, tears were welling up in your eyes but you willed yourself not to cry. Wasn’t this break up supposed to empower you?

                “Don’t contact me again. The last time you’ll see me is when I come by to pick up my things.”

                You hung up quickly. The tears you were holding back began to stream down your face; you deleted Ben’s contact and blocked his number.

                The front door swung open. Mark called your name and you hurriedly tried to wipe your tears. You slid off the couch, trying not to disturb Chica. She, surprisingly, had slept through the whole exchange. You turned to the front door and there he was, Sean/Jack. And damn was he attractive.

                You walked over to them. “I guess your Jack… or Sean. I don’t know what name you prefer.” You said. You tried to hide the fact that you’d just been crying. “I didn’t really expect you to be so… green.”

                His bright green hair stood out to you, but it only made him more interesting. His smile was enchanting, and to know he was smiling at you… wow.

                “You can call me Sean, that’s my real name anyways. And you must be y/n.” He had an Irish accent; you didn’t know he was Irish.

                “Okay enough introductions.” Mark said, he took Sean’s suitcase and placed it in the guest room. “As you know I only have one guest room so someone’s gonna have to sleep on the couch.”

                “I will.” You and Sean said simultaneously. You both glanced at each other and chuckled.

                “Why don’t we switch off?” you suggested.

                “Sounds good to me!” Sean said; he sure had a lot of enthusiasm. You wondered what he was like when he was mad. Ben would always get really quiet, that’s when you knew you did something wrong. You frowned, you really shouldn’t be thinking about Ben now that you’ve broken up with him.

                “You okay?” Sean asked. Your sudden mood change must have been obvious.

                “Yeah, I’m fine. Mark, can I talk to you.”

                “Of course, make yourself at home Jack.” Mark replied, he followed you out to the balcony.

                “I- I broke up with him.” You said. “But I don’t feel any better.” Your eyes welled up with tears again. You wished you had the ability to stop them, but you felt so helpless.

                “I’m proud of you y/n.” Mark said, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder. You started to shake with your sobs, Mark pulled you into a tight hug and you clutched onto his shirt.

                You didn’t see the way Sean jealously watched you two hug. He’d only just met you but he wanted to be the one comforting you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't get used to this soon of an update. I just needed to add sean in lol


	6. Breakfast

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Maybe it was the lighting or maybe it was the invigorating smell of coffee but you just really wanted to kiss Sean"

                “So what’s your favorite kind of movie?” You asked Sean. Your back was sore from sleeping on the couch, but it was fine.

                “I don’t know, I really like horror movies but I watch mostly everything.”  He responded. Mark was kind enough to make breakfast and coffee while you and Sean made small talk.

                “What about you?” He asked.

                “Well my favorite movie is The Princess Bride. So, action romance I guess?” You chuckled. The hot coffee was warming your hands, and making you feel warm inside. Maybe it was the lighting or maybe it was the invigorating smell of coffee but you just really wanted to kiss Sean.

                “Breakfast is ready” Mark announced, breaking you out of your thoughts. He placed a stack of pancakes down on the table before sitting next to you.

                “Wow Mark these look delicious.” Sean said, taking four out of the pile.

                “Thanks.” He said, taking two pancakes.

                You grabbed one, making sure not to make too much noise when eating. Whenever you and Ben ate together he’d always complain that you were doing something wrong. It always felt like you were treading on eggshells with him. You never knew what would make him mad at you, it seemed like it was a different thing each time.

                “y/n,” Mark asked. “Are you okay, you’ve barely touched your food?”

                “Yeah, I’m fine.” You said, taking another bite out of your pancake.

                “What are we going to do today Mark?” Sean asked, already done with his first pancake.

                “I think we should record a collab video, y/n could be in it too.” Mark said, glancing at you.

                “No thanks, I’m uh camera shy.” You said, picking at what was left of your pancake.  

                “We could do truth or dare!” Sean said enthusiastically, “Come on y/n it’d be fun.”  You knew it’d be a mistake to look at his pleading eyes, but goddamn he was hard to resist.

                “Fine.” You said, rolling your eyes. Mark and Sean chuckled.

                “Ill tweet the fans; I’m sure they have great ideas.” Mark said, pulling out his phone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is short, I have writers block sorry.


	7. Video

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You mean as a friend? Because then the answer is yes, but there’s nothing more between us.”

                “y/n.” Sean said, intently staring at you. His gaze caused you to blush and you hoped that the camera didn’t pick it up. “Truth or Dare?”

                You really didn’t like being in front of a camera, but being sandwiched between Mark and Sean really helped calm your nerves. It had taken Mark twenty minutes to set up his cameras and in that time, his fans has tweeted 10,000 truth or dare tweets.

                “Um,” You hesitated, “Dare?”

                Sean smiled deviously, “I have got a good one!” You smiled nervously, you really didn’t want to embarrass yourself in front of Sean; you had only known him for a day now. “I dare you to sit in someone’s lap for the next round.”

                You looked the camera with a look of dissatisfaction.  “Mark.” You said. “Would you mind? I might squish you.”

                “You think you could squish someone as strong as me?”  He said playfully, flexing his muscles. You rolled your eyes and sat in his lap, leaning against his chest.

                “Mark, Truth or Dare?” You asked.

                “Truth.” He said, his voice vibrating through your body.

                You picked up your phone and began scrolling through the hashtag Mark set up. “Who was your first crush?” You asked.

                “Probably you y/n.” Mark said, laughing.

                “That’s because I was the only girl who would willingly talk to you.” You laughed. You got off of Mark and sat back in your usual spot, oblivious to the jealous glare Sean was giving Mark.

                “Sean.” Mark said. “Truth or Dare?”

~

                The rest of the video went well; you didn’t feel like you embarrassed yourself anymore than you usually do. Mark stood up to go download the video and put his equipment away. You leaned back against the couch.

                “That was fun.” You announced to the room.

                “y/n. Be honest with me.” Sean said, suddenly serious. “Do you love Mark?”

                Your heart rate quickened. “You mean as a friend? Because then the answer is yes, but there’s nothing more between us.”

                “Then he wouldn’t mind me doing this…”

                “Doing wh-” You were cut off by Sean kissing you softly on the lips. Your eyes widened and you froze, Sean pulled away hastily.

                “I’m sorry I shouldn’t have done that.”  He said quickly, he ran off to the guest room quickly. But not quick enough for you to miss the tears welled up in his eyes. You buried your head in your hands.


	8. forgiveness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Sean was on the couch looking like he was about to tear his hair out"

          “y/n?” Mark asked softly through the bathroom door. “Are you okay?”

          “Yeah.” You mumbled, leaning your head back against the wall.

          “Sean really regrets what he did and he wants you to know that.” Mark said; trying the door for the hundredth time, hoping you’d unlocked it.

          “I know. That’s not why I’m upset.”

          “Can you please come out? Sean wants to talk to you.”

          “He can talk to me through the door.” You responded curtly. You weren’t upset that Sean had kissed you; you were upset that you enjoyed it. Sean could be in a relationship for all you know, and just wanted a fun vacation fling with you. You’d been hurt enough by love and didn’t want to take another risk.

          “Please y/n, we’re worried about you.” Mark pleaded. You took a deep breath,

          “Fine.” You stood up slowly and opened the door. Mark immediately enveloped you into his arms and you were quick to wrap your arms around him.

          “Sean’s in the living room. I’ll be in my bedroom minding my own business.” He said, giving you a gentle push towards the living room. Sure enough, Sean was on the couch looking like he was about to tear his hair out.

          “Hey.” You said softly from the doorway.

          “y/n!” Sean said, jumping up quickly to see your frame. “I’m so sorry. I don’t know what came over me – well actually I do – but I’m so sorry.”

          “I know.” You said, sitting down on the couch by him. A few moments of silence pass and Sean begins to nervously tap his foot.

          “I’m not mad at you” You whisper, Sean lets out a sigh of relief. “I just don’t think this is the best time, I don’t even know that much about you.”

          “I really like you y/n. I don’t know why, but after my girlfriend broke up with me I didn’t think I’d ever love anyone again.” Sean said, chuckling nervously.

          You were at a loss of words.

          “Mark told me you just broke up with your boyfriend so don’t worry about it. We’ll start off as friends.”

          “Thanks Sean.” You said quietly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey heres an update. I literally don't watch these youtubers anymore but I'll try to keep them in character. my writing has gone to shit too so i'm sorry


	9. Beginnings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Sean sighed and leaned his head against your shoulder"

         It’s been two days since the kissing incident, you were able to make eye contact and easily speak to Sean, a step in your friendship. He insisted that you two should swap numbers and Skype contacts.

         “What’s a Skype?” You ask, innocently, looking at his username. Sean didn’t respond so you looked up to him. He was looking at you with the most incredulous look on his face. “What?” You asked again, tilting your head to the side slightly.

         “Are you serious?!” Sean shouted; you winced. “Sorry!” he apologized quickly, placing his hands on your shoulders to comfort you, a gesture you have gotten used to. “A Skype is a service you can use to video chat with people.” He explained.

         “That sounds cool.” You muttered.

         “I’ll help you make one, let me just get my laptop.” He said, getting up off the couch and walking to the guest room. Mark had gone out to run some errands with Amy, so it was just you and Sean in the apartment.

         “Okay,” Sean said as he walked back into the room. “All you have to do is make a username and a password.”  

         “Sure.” You said, typing your go-to username and password into their corresponding places.  

         “Awesome, now we can video chat when I go back home!” He said, shutting his laptop.

         “Where’s home, exactly?” You asked. Sean leaned back into the couch and put his arm on the top of it. You could feel his fingers brush your neck and you weren’t sure if it was intentional or not.

         “Ireland, couldn’t you tell because of my accent?” He laughed.

         “Well you could’ve just moved here.” You said, crossing your arms; jokingly defensive.

         “What about you?” He asked.

         “Cincinnati.” You said, “Mark and I used to be neighbors; that’s how we met. I moved there when I was five.”

         Sean sighed and leaned his head against your shoulder. You stiffened at first but relaxed. You were becoming more used to the boys’ close contact.

         “Do you want to watch a movie?” Sean asked, lifting his head up and his ocean eyes glaring into yours.

         “Uh sure, what do you want to watch?” You asked. You suddenly felt sweaty and nervous. Sean’s gaze switched to the racks of DVD’s by the TV.

         Sean hummed, “The Matrix?”

         “I haven’t seen it, so sure.” You said. Sean got up to put the DVD in. When he came back, he sat right next to you, so your hips were touching. It didn’t feel bad, but you were constantly aware that his leg was touching yours.

         You were already struggling to focus on the movie because of that, and it didn’t help that every so often Sean would glance at you to see your reaction. It really didn’t help when Sean moved his arm from the top of the couch to your shoulders, pinning you to his side.

         Once the movie was over Sean faced you with a wide smile on his face. “How was it?!” He loudly asked.

         “Confusing.” You answered, trying to hide the fact that you couldn’t pay attention to the movie at all.

         “I’ll explain it to you.” Sean said, before talking about the plot, characters and more you didn’t pay attention to because the way he was talking so passionately really made you want to study his face. Your gaze went from his hair to his lips to his neck, and you were glad that he was so focused on talking that he didn’t notice your wandering gaze.

         “Do you get it know?”

         “Um, yeah.” You lied, averting your gaze from his face. He laughed, a deep chuckle that you could feel in your very soul.

         “You aren’t very good at lying y/n.” He teased.  You frowned, you were always so afraid of lying to Ben that you just never did.

         “I’m sorry.” Sean said, his happy demeanor turning sour.

         “Stop apologizing, It’s not your fault.” You grumbled. “I’m going to take a nap, see you later.”   


End file.
